Lesson

Warm Up

Take a good look at your English teacher. What adjectives would you use to describe him/her? Discuss with a friend.

Listening Zone

Read and listen to the following dialogue.

Mei-Ling: What’s up with you, Abdul?
Abdul: Oh, I’ve just had a class with Andy and it was very bad.
Mei-Ling: What’s wrong with him? I wouldn’t mind a few private lessons with him.
Abdul: Everything, really. We had to be flowers and describe our feelings as the gardener approached us with shears. Something to do with the present tense, I think. I didn’t have a clue what it was about. He looked as if he hadn’t prepared at all.
Mei-Ling: Andy sounds much more fun than Edith, that fat cow I have. Her bottom wobbles as she writes on the board.
Abdul: Edith’s really nice, though. And she’s always very well prepared. Well, her teaching is prepared—shame about her smelly armpits. She took our class once, and she was really clear, and everything.
Mei-Ling: It must be all that foundation she slaps on. Her face is so thick with make-up that anything she says would be clear in comparison.
Abdul: Oh, Mei-Ling, don’t be so nasty. I’m sure that moustache will disappear eventually. Andy couldn’t even explain the difference between the different present tenses after we’d thrown our branches around.
Mei-Ling: And what are the differences, then?
Abdul: Well, I can’t remember all of them at the moment. Perhaps I should ask Andy to explain again next lesson. He probably won’t have a clue. I don’t know why I bother going to his classes.

Task

Is your class teacher like Edith or Andy? Discuss in groups which teacher you would like to have and why.

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Language Spot

Read the dialogue again and underline the verbs look, sound and smell. For example:

He looked as if he hadn’t prepared at all.

These are verbs of perception.

Pattern 1: subject + verb of perception + adjective: He smelt awful.

Pattern 2: subject + verb of perception + as if/as though + phrase: She sounded as though she’d been at the sherry again.

Pattern 3: subject + verb of perception + like + noun: She looks like a startled horse.

Write sentences like these to describe your teacher.

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Practice Pod

Work in groups to survey the students in your school about the teachers. Here are some things you might want to ask about:

• personality
• personal habits and hygiene
• use of drugs and alcohol
• items found on their desk
• sexual preferences
• clothes and fashion sense
• body shape and facial hair
• teaching ability
• language points they have problems with
• probable reasons for teaching English (and leaving their home country)